Archives / 14 post/s found

…it takes exactly eighteen shots tae polish off a fifth…

by Simon Butler
in
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...it takes exactly eighteen shots tae polish off a fifth o' a bottle o' Scotch, thus, a game o' golf equates tae eighteen holes...

I know I am getting better at golf because I…

by Simon Butler
in
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I know I am getting better at golf because I am hitting fewer spectators.

I call upon all nations to do everything they can…

by Simon Butler
in
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I call upon all nations to do everything they can to stop these terrorist killers. Thank you. Now watch this drive.

Golf is a game whose aim is to hit a…

by Simon Butler
in
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Golf is a game whose aim is to hit a very small ball into an ever smaller hole, with weapons singularly ill-designed for the purpose

The least thing upset him on the links. He missed…

by Simon Butler
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The least thing upset him on the links. He missed short putts because of the uproar of the butterflies in the adjoining meadows.

Golf… is the infallible test. The man who can go…

by Simon Butler
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Golf... is the infallible test. The man who can go into a patch of rough alone, with the knowledge that only God is watching him, and play his ball where it lies, is the man who will serve you faithfully and well.

Mistakes are part of the game. It’s how well you…

by Simon Butler
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Mistakes are part of the game. It's how well you recover from them, that's the mark of a great player.

”If you drink, don’t drive. Don’t even putt.”

by Simon Butler
in
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"If you drink, don’t drive. Don’t even putt."

To find a man’s true character, play golf with him.

by Simon Butler
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To find a man's true character, play golf with him.

The greatest thing about tomorrow is, I will be better…

by Simon Butler
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The greatest thing about tomorrow is, I will be better than I am today. And that's how I look at my life. I will be a better golfer, I will be a better person, I will be a better father, I will be a better husband, I will be a better friend. That's the beauty of tomorrow.

It took me seventeen years to get three thousand hits…

by Simon Butler
in
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It took me seventeen years to get three thousand hits in baseball. It took one afternoon on the golf course.

Hockey is a sport for white men. Basketball is a…

by Simon Butler
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Hockey is a sport for white men. Basketball is a sport for black men. Golf is a sport for white men dressed like black pimps.

Although golf was originally restricted to wealthy, overweight Protestants, today…

by Simon Butler
in
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Although golf was originally restricted to wealthy, overweight Protestants, today it's open to anybody who owns hideous clothing.

I regard golf as an expensive way of playing marbles.

by Simon Butler
in
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I regard golf as an expensive way of playing marbles.